106 – Remnants

I looked into my eyes, there were remnants, some kind of leftovers…. Of victimhood. 
Some of which, I wished these “bullies of life” lay dead than stay alive harming others.
How did humans become monsters?
I believe no child was born being a monster (even if parents were “monsters”). 
Regardless of how we came onto this earth….
I believed the Universe (God, Creator etc) has created us beautifully with much love, joy, unique gifts, purity and innocence. 
But due to actions we took and choices we made, circumstances were born and some of us went on the wrong path over and over again thus becoming “monsters” of our lives.
Does that mean, its the end of the road for us?
(why I say us is because I felt that to a certain degree, we each carry some form of “monsters” within us).
I’m a compassionate being and have so much love for humans everywhere. But when it comes to bullies of my past, I tend to be otherwise. 
I turned stonecold. And I became stoic. Like an emotionless machine. 
Even if they were a part of me, (call it blood or family ties) I can disrobe them like clothes I don’t need.
What if these bullies grew old and fragile and vulnerable? 
Can I still see them thru the eyes of hatred? 
And what if they felt guilty and remorseful?
Is it easy to forgive? And can I ever forget?
Forgiveness I can utter to myself, a gift I’m willing to bestow upon myself. 
But to forget? That takes habit of healing. To face them until no more remnants of woundedness and victimhood is felt.
How did we get to be this way? 
Were we made to be monsters? 
How did love became hate? 
How did any human perform heinous crimes towards another being? 
And why? 
Love is the most powerful healer. 
So how do we restore the goodness in mankind? 
And how do we restore love within ourselves, everyday? 
This is what I feel like saying, waking up….
Love,
Lina. 
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