Day 40 – the art of being authentic, conscious and abundant woman series continues….
what I feel like saying…
I will go back to my favorite topic: Authenticity.
If people are being honest with themselves then will our families be strong. Divorce may be a thing of the past.
I wished my Mother in law was honest about her not liking me from day one, then the crumbling of a marriage or the wedding itself may be able to be prevented.
But it already has happened and I believed everything happened for a reason (truly grateful for lessons learnt/unlearn and my wonderful kids).
And I wished people stopped bullshitting themselves and the world about their truth.
My “story” …
From the beginning, I told my potential suitors that I cannot tolerate snorers. I’ve tried but I just can’t. And getting married to anyone of them means a lifetime of sleeplessness…
And sleep is important to me. As an empath and highly sensitive person in my surroundings, to discharge and heal, I need a good sleep to reawaken and rejuvenate the next day.
Marriage is not just about loving someone so much that they ignore their “cannot tolerate list” . And my love was not strong enough to make peace with that.
And after years of experience, I realised we need more than love in a marriage.
I’m a light sleeper and I cannot tolerate people who snore. I noticed this in my teenage years when I was sleep deprived. I get really cranky and nasty if I don’t rest fully thru sleep.
And I shared it out front with those closest to me. It’s not their shortcoming, it’s mine.
Imagine my great disappointment when my former spouse lied to me with this truth before we got married. And we were young, there were many things we were not truthful with one another.
Perhaps we believed that love conquers all or perhaps love is not just blind but deaf as well (this is not about sharing bad stuff about another. It is my shortcoming that I cannot embrace everything about my former spouse. But if truth was to be shared, I honestly felt my former spouse would have a better wife than me, like his current spouse now- one who can accept all of him).
And the very thing I was honest about was the very thing I had to tolerate (this is a very big lesson on law of attraction for me- if u focus on attributes you do not want in a partner, that is what you get.. But if you focus on the good attributes you wanted, the Universe will hear that loud and clear. Remember the most energy you give to whatever you focused on… is what you actually get.)
Why pretend? Is it because we are ashamed of ourselves? Is it because we fear our loved ones cannot accept us as we are? If that is the case, then those are not your loved ones.
Our masks will eventually show its fraud-Ness. Our authenticity will show up one day after years of being hidden. It’s exhausting to show up other than ourselves. To act every day as someone else.
Love as a human being has lots of flaws. Sometimes it’s unconditional but mostly it’s conditional. We may fall head over heels in love with one person today and may hate that very person in decades to come, for the very thing we loved.
Only divine Love to me is unconditional and perfect.
Though I love to suggest to people to rediscover their true self and authenticity… Its not an easy task.
I have many masks and identities within me that I used to interchange. And as a writer, I also have a fluid demeanor which can flow thru many perspectives to understand a story or situation in many different ways.
But truthfully, I cannot say I’m 100% me now. I can only say- I strive to be the authentic version of me, at all times.
But that does not mean, I won’t cave into my many false identities when I felt threatened, or fearful, or anxious or protective of my loved ones.
But even so, the true heart of it all is to learn to forgive.
Forgive this dear self that has been doing her best.
So, with loads of time on our hands, staying home with our loved ones, let’s start peeling our many masks and trash them.
Wear authenticity , everyday.
Be bold. There is only one of You in this world (regardless of peeps saying there are 7 of us). We are unique. We are beautiful no matter how bizarre or weird, we may be.
And respect our own boundaries.
I look forward to feel your essence, your truth, and your energetic awesomeness in this world.
Have fun, rediscovering your self.
Do check out my previous everyday postings on women empowerment 🙂
Creating tribes of authentic, conscious
abundant women around the world.
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