Day 17 – the art of being authentic, conscious and abundant woman series continues….
what I feel like saying…
I was a part of a supportive parent group in a school. And I was amazed at their great support for sportsmanship and students welfare. These parents will do their best to ensure their kids are well supported in all aspects not just studies but in sports and life as well.
But there was one time, I was overseas and a single parent like me was overwhelmed.
She shared her struggles while wanting to pull her son and herself out of this group and the sports group her son was in.
I thought it was brave of her to share openly since single parenting can still be a stigma in some communities.
There was one comment that totally turned me off. A parent, a father I figured.
He said something like – everyone has problems. And the chat went silent.
I was on the move and not able to reply ASAP.
I understand that in many Asian communities, we were not taught to voice out and share. And when we do share, we were accused of playing victim and seeking attention.
In fact as a child growing up, we may be silenced many, many times by the adults.
Truth is, sharing, seeking solutions or help is not a sign of weakness. And the way she said it, she was not complaining or blaming nor acting as victim, she was just voicing out her truth at that moment.
And I know that, not many dare to bare their soul out. Because its not easy. And in vulnerability, there lies our greatest powers.
I wrote back later applauding her bravery. I told her that we can meet up and seek solutions if she want or if she need immediate response, I urged her to meet the parent leaders who I believed have been very helpful to other parents.
And as much as I wanted that man to shut up and rethink his responses, I had to “educate” people who are not able to put themselves in our shoes.
I told her that – yes as a single parent, we have to do everything on our own. Some of us- We do not want to burden anyone or even society. That’s why we do our best to ensure our kids are well taken care of, by ourselves.
And I shared some of my struggles along with my solutions in life. And hoping she understood that she’s not alone.
And of course my lengthy reply and me coming out of my “single parent” cupboard definitely kept that chat at an extra long silence.
But seriously, if nothing good comes out of your mouth or even your finger texts, please keep your mouth shut. I believe everyone can do that. Respect each others’ struggles. Give each other space to voice out. And keep those non positive remarks to yourself.
Allow only empowering, motivating and positive words for others with much love. With today’s technology, the ease of ranting out loud nonsense or even lies (fitnah) seems rampant.
Yes, everyone has struggles. But remember also, that everyone is doing their bestest to live life with what they already know and experienced.
See the world thru eyes of love. Not contempt.
And because of that fear…
Some of us who truly need help, rather resigned in depression than cry out for help.
.. Eventually we carry everything to our graves.
And no one can help nor even learn from our experiences.
Do check out my previous everyday postings on women empowerment 🙂
Creating tribes of authentic, conscious
abundant women around the world.
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