I once had this unhealthy belief about life and relationships. So much so that I became own life “accountant” by tighting the reign on my loved ones in hope that I can control who comes and goes in my life.
This unhealthy belief was : For new person to enter my life permanently, someone in my current “family” has to “go” (be with the Divine).
I’ve witness from a young age that for every new birth, there has to be a death. And that saddens me. It felt like the Divine has the utmost authority especially on my loved ones. And i felt helpless.
I struggled a lot with it. When I got married, my dear grandmom passed on. She was very close to me, my bff. When I gave birth, someone passed on from our family, and so on.
Fear consumes me…due to what I began to believe as my “truth”.
I held tightly to my loved ones. I never let anyone get close to me. I do not wish for more to “disappear” from my life. It was devastating to carry this belief within me.
Soon not just closed relationships got affected, any relationships with me, was affected. Any new acquaintance, I observed wryly, keeping my distance. But I love peeps, I can never keep this for long. And so it created an inner turmoil, conflicts of all sorts.
Eventually, like the toddler who refused to gave up do his best to gain attention from his parents, this belief will “sabotage” me and created a pattern of attracting the same type of people with the end result of same: pain.
And if that did not gain my attention enough for me to do something about it, it will eventually manifest itself into pain and dis-ease.
I cannot let this went on and on. And so i took time off to sit with this belief. I sat and question with love.
The end game to every unhealthy belief is to question: Does this belief serve me for my highest good? If not, why am I still holding onto it? What pleasure am I gaining for keeping this “story” alive?
As I “tweak” my beliefs (release/change them), my relationships changed too. They flourish well and the quality of people attracted changes too.
You can do the same.
Not all beliefs can stay the same throughout our lifetime. Have the courage to face them, tweak them and change them when they no longer serve you with their truths.
For every challenges that you face and every success, abundance, love etc that you seek which seems to never reach you, there is a belief that no longer supports that “destination of success”/intention.
Dig deeper within. Find a quiet time and be with yourself. Meditate. Ask your higher self. Ask the Divine. Do what feels right.
Everyone can do this. Kids can do it too.
If unsure, I can help you.
Together we can find the root cause of it (beliefs). You can contact me at email@example.com to identify and heal this.
For better health, abundance, success and love in mind, body, heart and soul, may we each be blessed with joy and love always.