Thoughts are energy. What about spoken words?
I once heard at a talk that words spoken out loud to another is like hitting nails on fences. When mistakes are done, the nails will be removed and the damage will still be seen. The gaping hole. And some form of putty can be used as a filler. But the fence can never be restored back to its original state.
The harm is done.
How we converse to others reflect clearly how we converse to ourselves. The more abusive our language became, the more abusive we are (not just to the outside world but to ourselves as well). And its detrimental to health.
In an unhealthy relationship like co-dependency relationship, when one party abuses the other with negative words, it can be very damaging not just to our self esteem, (when tolerated for decades can be hazardous to body, heart, mind and soul)…. but our surroundings and especially our kids.
Words have energy in them. Spoken words, written words, intended words (even silently)…
I’ve learnt to heal using quranic verses recited on water in my youth. And many more “new agey healing methods” this past decade including using spoken words of love on water and drink them to heal one self of myriad dis-eases.
And the late Dr. Masaru Emoto has also done extensive research and experiments on water which strengthen further within me that words can heal or kill someone.
Personally as a child, I’ve witness many outraging outburst from adults to their loved ones. In fact, I was one of the victim. It was scary. And it hurts badly.
The consequences to be paid is so deadly that it may take decades to heal from those experiences.
I think someone who is abusive (physically) and someone who is abusive in his words are both hazardous to the people around them.
My advice to their loved ones:
You don’t have to tolerate it. Walk away… Love yourself enough to know that those who love you will not “kill you slowly” with their words. If they cannot be changed or do not bother to change, then you change for the sake of your own joy. Walk away.
Only you know when enough is enough.
You deserve the best no matter who or what you think you are. Don’t settle for less.
Don’t think for a bit that we can change anyone. Not in love, in marriage for better or worse. We can only change ourselves for the better.
Words like stupid, worthless, useless, idiot, bitch, whores, and many more should not be uttered to loved ones no matter what state of emotions or mind, one is in.
Words uttered out can never be taken back. Remember the fence and the nails?
Let’s hold our tongues when we are in anger, fury or in unstable conditions… walk it out. Breathe in and out.
Once calm, share with- I feel angry …. not I am angry.
Hope that helps.
Note: Heart walls are created often out of fear to protect our so called vulnerable fragile heart.
Exercise caution when speaking with your children especially when they are at a very tender young age.
Words spoken cannot be retrieved. And kids absorbed more than just the literal meaning but energy and emotions as well.
We carry our “wounded child” within us and often adults we replayed those memories over and over again and claim our wounded child identity based on that.
Sometimes, we blocked those unpleasant memories out but the “harm is already done”.
These memories and trapped emotions that we dislike/hated lies hidden in our bodies. And they gets accumulated if one is not aware and do something about it.
And once accumulated, the molehill will eventually become a mountain. When we are not conscious, the Universe might give us a “wake up call” thru dis-eases and pain. So we can learn/unlearn and heal..and Make changes for a much better life.